How many of you hate stepping on the scale?
…I’ll bet every person that just read the above sentence shouted “YES!” Do you know why we hate it
so much?
Because
it tells us we’re failing and we don’t like to hear that. Because
we let it define us – when it shouldn’t. Because
it is depressing when the number goes up or doesn’t move. Because
it ruins our entire day! Because
it makes us cry. Because
it has a power over us that we struggle to break. Because…because…because…
…the list goes on and on, yet we continue to step on it time and
time again, hoping, praying that just maybe today will be the day that those
numbers reflect our hard work, our dedication and our desire to weigh less.
Many of us hold out hope every morning, only to have them quickly diminished
and what does that do to the rest of our day???
Depression. It is real my friends. Very, very real. That scale you
step on every morning or possibly every week is not lifting you up. It’s
bringing you down. You do not need a daily dose of Debbie downers! Or weekly
for that matter. How does depression help you in this journey? It doesn’t. It
makes you want to quit, to give up, and to hide away in your home where nobody
can see you.
How do I know this? Am I just running my mouth? No, I’m sharing my
pain with you, my experiences and I’ll just bet that you can relate to them,
can’t you?
Here's a short video I put together of my success and my downfall: Journey Back
Do you know my story? Have you been my friend for a while or are
you new here? For those of you old and new, here is my story. I hope it will
inspire you to step away from the scale and keep walking in your journey to a
healthier life. You are going to fall down, off the wagon, trust me – I have a
few times. This time I stayed down a lot longer than I ever should have and now
I’m picking myself back up, dusting off my shoes and getting back in the fight.
I’m going to give you the short version – not easy for me, I’m
usually pretty long winded. You can read the very first post of this blog (before I began working on my consistency)
HERE and then follow up by reading today’s post.
I did not begin having or really struggling with weight issues
until after my son was born in 2002. I gained a lot of weight with him and it
did not come off as easily as it had with his big sister. Instead, it seemed to
keep coming. I was no longer a size 3 but a 5 and then a 7…and the numbers just
kept getting bigger. I think the biggest I've ever been is a size 14 and for a small 5 foot 2 frame...that's a lot!
It was depressing. In 2003, I was struggling with some health
issues and I had been battling some anxiety and depression since my son was
about 2 months old. Looking back, I guess things started to go downhill July of
2002. My husband and I had some marital trouble to add to the mix and that of
course didn’t help. By the time we moved to England in 2008, I had lost a
little weight but I seemed to be doing this yo-yo thing…lose a little, gain a
little and repeat. I was also on a crazy amount of medication at this time for
all sorts of things. It was ridiculous!
The summer of 2011 my husband deployed and would be gone for 6 months,
missing Christmas for the first time ever. I decided not long after he left to
start taking better care of myself. I do not know why it works this way, but
most women (I know I’m not alone in this) can focus better on this when their
husband is away. I wanted to surprise him. I wanted to lose as much weight as I
could before he returned. So I jumped in with both feet and took off.
I had a total of 30 pounds I needed to lose to reach my goal. By
the time he returned home I’d lost 16 pounds. Once he returned however, I was
able to maintain my focus and keep working towards my goal. I finally got with
in reaching distance of 125 and I seemed to be pretty happy at 133. I felt good
too. I was involved in many things, many things that I seriously miss.
Today – I’m starting over. I’ve gained all 30 + 10 back. Yup, 40
pounds, I’m the heaviest I’ve ever known myself to be and I hate it. I feel
like a failure. I know better, for crying out loud I’m a trainer. I am
embarrassed that I let this happen to myself. I am ashamed I did not handle the
changes, the loss, the grief and the move in my life better. I’m disappointed I
did not maintain my weight. I have beaten myself up over and over and over
because of it, but you know what? That is getting me nowhere!
I keep telling myself over and over in my head… “If you want it done right, do it the way
your trainer showed you”. So what’s stopping me? Why am I not following my
own advice and doing as Herman taught me?
Because I
outgrew all my amazing gym clothes. Because I
don’t want anyone to see me. Because I
want to hide in my house. Because
pj’s are comfy and inexpensive. Because I
feel I need to lose a little at home first…
The list goes on and on. Eventually, we have to stop making
excuses, stop saying one more glass of sweet tea, one more cheat meal, one more
coffee, one more…one more…one more.
Eventually, we have to dig deep and find the
motivation we need to push forward either for the first time or again and
again. I remember a great many things Herman said to me during our training
sessions and one of those things he would say is to VISUALIZE what you want, where you want to be. I believe he told me
that because your body will not go where you mind will not take it.
Do you want to see what my visualization was?
Do you know what it is now?
I was looking good and I want to look good again. I’m moving again
soon and to a more active area; an area where 5K’s and ½ marathons will be easier
to participate in and so I’ve found a new motivation. I want to be ready to
participate in these things again – therefore I have got to get my body in
shape!
This body – is currently UNDER
CONSTRUCTION.
I’m starting out slow. I know I cannot do the things I could
before because I’ve lost muscle and gained fat. It’s high time I flipped that
around again. I am currently following the 21 Day Fix meal plan and I am
walking. I want to run so badly, but I know I’m not ready and I’m dealing with
a little Plantar Fasciitis that causes my entire left leg to pain me.
I’ve not had sweet tea in a week – not even the other night when
we went to Olive Garden to celebrate my husband’s birthday. I had water. I also
got to thinking the only thing I ate that I probably should have avoided was
the bread sticks. I had salad and I had baked chicken with roasted potatoes (including sweet potatoes).
I’ve not had coffee creamer in a week. I’ve been adding coffee to
my Shakeology – so good! I’ve not had toast, not a lot of bread, not a lot of
cheese…I feel I’m doing better in the kitchen and that is where the biggest
part of the job takes place.
I am building my strength up and I will begin the 21 Day Fix
workout program in a week or two. I’m taking one day at a time and I’m being
real and sharing that journey with you. I hope that it encourages you to get up
and try again. If I can do it…so can you. I believe in you.
Today, I’m going to give you a challenge. I want you to first
believe it or not step on the scale and then write that number down. I always
do this first thing before I get dressed. Next, I want you to take your
measurements, neck, biceps, bust, hips, waist, thighs and calves…write all that
down (I hope you have a notebook).
After that I want you to put on something pretty, do your make up and either
take a selfie or have someone take your photo for you. This is going to be your
BEFORE photo.
I see all these miserable looking before photos and well…yeah, I’m
miserable, but I made that choice and I’m making the choice now to change it. I
want to picture to reflect our change of mindset. Use a photo app and right the
number the scale shows you on your photo and then I want you to put all of that
aside and leave it in a safe place for 30 days. I don’t want you to step on the
scale, take your measurements or photos for 30 days.
Can you commit to not weighing in for 30 whole days???
I don’t want you disappointed, discouraged or depressed. I want
you to stay away from that scale!
I want you to focus on baby steps.
The first one being your food, what meal plan are you following?
Are you eating healthy or not? Do you need help in this area? What can I do to
help you?
The second step is I want you to exercise for 30 minutes and if
all you can do is walk for 30 minutes then that is what I want you to do.
Purposely walk for 30 minutes, get your heart rate up a little bit.
And the third step is to download an app or wear a Fitbit or
something to count your steps. The goal is 10,000 per day. I want you building
your activity levels.
These are simple baby steps and this is where I want you to start.
It’s where I myself am starting. Tomorrow we will talk more on food, but for
now I need you to pray and decide to 30 days – no scale and 30 days of baby
steps.
If you are willing to accept the challenge – send me an email coachtonya1@gmail.com or contact me on
Facebook. I want to walk with you through this journey. It’s a lot easier with
a friend.
Sincerely,
~Coach
Tonya~
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